Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize