the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize