I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize