i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
You dont lie about slip and slides
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
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