Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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