Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I currently don't understand fingers.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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