I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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