are you so shy because you have an std?
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Randomize
