# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
