you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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