Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
