Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
