his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
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