I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
