i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Randomize
