I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
the day after is always just damage control
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Randomize
