what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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