Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I want to be your penis for a week.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
