Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize
