yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
