haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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