WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
