it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
