Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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