fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize
