i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
