:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
