I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize