What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
