thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
