is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
