wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
Randomize
