I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize