At least make sure they are 18
Why
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize