I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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