I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
All the doctor said was why
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Randomize
