I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
