i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
