Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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