she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
