names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
