Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize