So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
He had one of those small greek statue penises
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Randomize
