I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
