Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
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