Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
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