If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
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