I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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