He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
