White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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