I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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