At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize